100 metre ki race ho rahi thi…
Referee said ‘1,2,3 GO!’…
Everybody started running except Alia bhatt.
Referee – y r u not running…?
Alia – My number is 4
Varun: how many apples can you eat on an empty stomach?
Alia: I can eat 6 apples.
Varun: Wrong. you can eat only 1 apple on empty stomach bcoz when you eat the 2nd apple tht’s not an empty stomach!
Alia: Wow superb joke I’ll tell my friend…
Alia to Shraddha: how many apples you can eat on an empty stomach ?
Shraddha: I can eat 10
Aliya: Pagal.. 6 bolti to mast joke sunati!!
SBI Bank: Humara bank aapko bina interest ke loan de raha hai….
Agar dene mein interest hi nahi hai to kyu de rahe ho? Nahi chahiye….
Once there was a mirror that killed anyone who lied..
FRENCH : I think I dont smoke (died)
AMERICAN : I think I love my wife (died)
ALIA BHATT: I think.. (died)
Alia bhatt and varun dhawan are walking on a road, and they find a 1000 rupee note lying down.
Alia – what should we do now?
Varun- we’ll take 50:50.
Alia- what about the remaining 900?
Alia Bhatt: Let’s go for movie .
Varun: Shit, I’ve got a doctor’s appointment today..
Alia Bhatt: Just cancel it,Tell him you’re sick.
Alia reading newspaper..
“Indian athlete lost gold medal in long jump”
Who told him to wear gold medal while jumping
Alia bhatt independence day ke liye Indian flag lene gayi..
Flag dekh kar Alia ne kuch kaha…
jisey sunkar dukaanwaala behosh ho gaya…
Guess what did Alia say ?
‘Isme aur colour dikhao’!!!